Met up with Max and the Jonibobs, as expected. Mum had been an unexpected Lady Bracknell today and was enjoying a long awaited Thermos cuppa. Several cries, whines and fights later (they're playing fighting games, Bud gave me a Chinese burn), it was time to go. It was then that my mum realised how dirty I'd got.
Go home and straight into the bath. Do not collect £200 as you pass Go. Do not touch anything.
Note from mum - Bud didn't give him a Chinese burn. He was waving bird poo in Bud's face and Bud shoed him away. Just in case you were wondering.