1. Tell Nana and Grandad that there are some Clarks football boots in John Lewis for £13.
2. Agree to having them plus a Diary of a Wimpy Kid book, instead of some ghouly stretchy toy whose eyes pop out when you pull it, for £23.
3. Gloss over the fact that they were size 13 and not £13, and in fact £28.
4. Charm the assistant so much that you get a free Lego City dvd.
5. Agree that mum can contact the football club later to check if the studs are acceptable.
6. Find out later that the studs need to be changed, because they need to be plastic not metal.
7. Discover that the stud spanner in the shoe box isn't the one that fits.
8. Be pleased when dad picks up the correct one from John Lewis on Day 2.
9. Be not pleased when dad realises they have given him the wrong one.
10. Welcome dad from the garage when he finds his old one that fits.
11. Ask Nana and Grandad to buy new studs the next day in town.
12. Count said studs the next day to find there is one missing.
13. Be upset when Nana says that it was the last packet.
14. Smile at dad when he gets a new pack of 12 studs the next day in his lunch hour (they restocked). This is now Day 3.
14. Glare at dad in disbelief when his spanner doesn't fit all the studs.
15. Agree to go to Sports Direct to find a new pair of football boots with plastic studs for £17.
16. Ask mum and dad if I can wear them to bed.
Mum said she's sure that buying ballet shoes can't be as confusing, although she remembers Tori's mum saying something about ballet socks? And to be fair, they have to wear their hair up and everything.